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Thread started 05/15/18 12:21pm

benni

Article: Prince Without Permission

It probably has been, but I don't recall reading it before.


https://www.npr.org/secti...permission

[Edited 5/15/18 12:21pm]

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Reply #1 posted 05/15/18 3:43pm

LovePaisley

Thanks, I never saw that one before either. The ending tho: awwww.

mushy
And the MUSIC continues...forever...
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Reply #2 posted 05/15/18 4:16pm

benni

LovePaisley said:

Thanks, I never saw that one before either. The ending tho: awwww. mushy


Yeah, that little baby! BIG TIME mushy ... The subtitle is what drew my interest:

On preparing for a world filled with new music, but missing the man

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Reply #3 posted 05/15/18 4:17pm

80tomato

thanks Benni ....Hasit Shah has written a few great articles on Prince

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Reply #4 posted 05/15/18 4:22pm

benni

80tomato said:

thanks Benni ....Hasit Shah has written a few great articles on Prince


You're welcome. I think this is the first article by Hasit Shah I've read regarding Prince. I may have to look up others! Thanks for the heads up on that!

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Reply #5 posted 05/15/18 4:38pm

poppys

I'm thinking, am I the only person who understands that Prince wanted to be alone when he was alone? It should be separate from his death.

My friend died of an accidental overdose with her partner in the bed next to her. Would it have been worse if she were alone? No.


[Edited 5/15/18 16:39pm]

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Reply #6 posted 05/15/18 4:45pm

benni

poppys said:

I'm thinking, am I the only person who understands that Prince wanted to be alone when he was alone? It should be separate from his death.

My friend died of an accidental overdose with her partner in the bed next to her. Would it have been worse if she were alone? No.


[Edited 5/15/18 16:39pm]


No, you aren't the only one to understand that poppys. I get that desire to be alone when I want to be alone, and don't bother me when I'm in that mood. But I think for most people, it just hurts for them to imagine someone dying alone, not surrounded by people they love.

My father died alone. We didn't even realize anything was wrong until he didn't show up at my grandma's like he was supposed to. The hardest thing in the world is for me to picture him, in that moment of dying, alone and maybe afraid and scared and feeling unloved because there was no one with him. And I often think, "Someone should have been there!" I think it's just natural for people to feel that way when someone dies suddenly and unexpectedly (especially for us fans).

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Reply #7 posted 05/15/18 5:06pm

poppys

Do you really think your father thought - I'm alone and I'm dying alone? I'm not so sure. And I'm not sure it is natural to think that it is negative, fan of Prince or not. Just more pressure.

Pets who are dearly loved often go away to die, they want to be alone. Family members can keep watch over a dying loved one in hospice for weeks on end - then their loved one dies when they finally leave the room. It's very common. The hospice staff will tell you, the person chose their time, they wanted to be alone.

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Reply #8 posted 05/15/18 5:11pm

purplerabbitho
le

I loved the description of P's personality. I think some folks on this board have the impression that his staff and co-workers hated him (that this gemini's good sides didn't sometimes negate his bad sides). The man he described seemed lovely.

Writer's words...

A few weeks before he died, Prince and I talked on the phone for an hour, because he unexpectedly wanted to discuss a piece I'd just written for NPR Music. He was funny, feisty, charming and kind. He was also eloquent, articulate and highly intelligent. It was a real conversation about music, the industry, social issues and life in general. He even gave me romantic advice.

Remember Blackwell's statements about how sometimes he would need a break from P but that often before long he was calling him again (after spending time around his family and them driving him crazy..LOL) wanting to see if he needed any drumming on a recording. People had their ups and downs with P. But overall, I don't think any of them wished him harm. those speculating that they did, may have only seen the bad sides. Prince was hard on Blackwell but he also according to Elisa Fiorillo stayed up all night with Blackwell consoling him when his father died.

80tomato said:

thanks Benni ....Hasit Shah has written a few great articles on Prince

[Edited 5/15/18 17:15pm]

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Reply #9 posted 05/15/18 5:15pm

benni

poppys said:

Do you really think your father thought - I'm alone and I'm dying alone? I'm not so sure. And I'm not sure it is natural to think that it is negative, fan of Prince or not. Just more pressure.

Pets who are dearly loved often go away to die, they want to be alone. Family members can keep watch over a dying loved one in hospice for weeks on end - then their loved one dies when they finally leave the room. It's very common. The hospice staff will tell you, the person chose their time, they wanted to be alone.


I know, I've worked in hospice. No one said it was a logical thought, but I do think it is a valid thought. Those same family members will tell you too that their initial reaction to not being there when their loved one died was not a positive, but rather a concern. Do I honestly think my dad thought that as he was dying? I don't know, I've never died, and wouldn't even know what his thought process was at that moment. I do know the idea of dying alone (and thus, from their perspective, lonely) scares a lot of people. You hear older single people say all the time, "I don't want to die alone." What they are actually saying is they don't want to be alone now and they are afraid they'll never find anyone before their time comes. But people have hang ups when it comes to death, just as they do about sex. And the idea of being alone when that time comes frightens many people, and they place that fear on to those they have loved that have died alone.

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Reply #10 posted 05/15/18 7:49pm

databank

avatar

benni said:

poppys said:

Do you really think your father thought - I'm alone and I'm dying alone? I'm not so sure. And I'm not sure it is natural to think that it is negative, fan of Prince or not. Just more pressure.

Pets who are dearly loved often go away to die, they want to be alone. Family members can keep watch over a dying loved one in hospice for weeks on end - then their loved one dies when they finally leave the room. It's very common. The hospice staff will tell you, the person chose their time, they wanted to be alone.


I know, I've worked in hospice. No one said it was a logical thought, but I do think it is a valid thought. Those same family members will tell you too that their initial reaction to not being there when their loved one died was not a positive, but rather a concern. Do I honestly think my dad thought that as he was dying? I don't know, I've never died, and wouldn't even know what his thought process was at that moment. I do know the idea of dying alone (and thus, from their perspective, lonely) scares a lot of people. You hear older single people say all the time, "I don't want to die alone." What they are actually saying is they don't want to be alone now and they are afraid they'll never find anyone before their time comes. But people have hang ups when it comes to death, just as they do about sex. And the idea of being alone when that time comes frightens many people, and they place that fear on to those they have loved that have died alone.

I think it really depends on people, doesn't it? I'd rather die alone because it's an intimate moment. Maybe when the day comes and if I see it coming I'll change my mind. Maybe I won't.

.

Who are we to know whether Prince wanted to die alone? Knowing the guy and how proud he was, I'd assume that he'd rather have died alone, but honestly what do I know, it's not like I've discussed the topic with him. We know him a lot but at the same time we don't know him at all, no lyrics, interview and biographies will ever change that: the man's a stranger to us just as much as each of us was one to him.

.

Anyway, we can't even know for sure that he was aware he was dying. Just because one feels like passing out, they don't automatically assume they gonna die. Maybe Prince's last thought was "Fuck, I'm gonna wake-up in a bloody hospital!".

A COMPREHENSIVE PRINCE DISCOGRAPHY (work in progress ^^): https://sites.google.com/...iscog/home
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Reply #11 posted 05/15/18 8:21pm

benni

databank said:

benni said:


I know, I've worked in hospice. No one said it was a logical thought, but I do think it is a valid thought. Those same family members will tell you too that their initial reaction to not being there when their loved one died was not a positive, but rather a concern. Do I honestly think my dad thought that as he was dying? I don't know, I've never died, and wouldn't even know what his thought process was at that moment. I do know the idea of dying alone (and thus, from their perspective, lonely) scares a lot of people. You hear older single people say all the time, "I don't want to die alone." What they are actually saying is they don't want to be alone now and they are afraid they'll never find anyone before their time comes. But people have hang ups when it comes to death, just as they do about sex. And the idea of being alone when that time comes frightens many people, and they place that fear on to those they have loved that have died alone.

I think it really depends on people, doesn't it? I'd rather die alone because it's an intimate moment. Maybe when the day comes and if I see it coming I'll change my mind. Maybe I won't.

.

Who are we to know whether Prince wanted to die alone? Knowing the guy and how proud he was, I'd assume that he'd rather have died alone, but honestly what do I know, it's not like I've discussed the topic with him. We know him a lot but at the same time we don't know him at all, no lyrics, interview and biographies will ever change that: the man's a stranger to us just as much as each of us was one to him.

.

Anyway, we can't even know for sure that he was aware he was dying. Just because one feels like passing out, they don't automatically assume they gonna die. Maybe Prince's last thought was "Fuck, I'm gonna wake-up in a bloody hospital!".


It really does depend upon the person. Some people really welcome that time, they feel they've come and done everything they've set out to do, others are terrified of the unknown. It's interesting, though, when you work with hospice, because you see some that tell you all along they are terrified of what is going to happen, but when the time comes, they are so full of grace and beauty and peace.

What I saw in hospice a lot, was that it wasn't the person's dying wish that the family thought about, but rather their own. The person may have requested to be alone during that time, but the family have a difficult time letting go, they felt they needed to be there at every moment. But ofttimes with hospice, when it gets towards the end, the individual in question goes inside and really aren't aware of what is going on around them. That was one of the ways that we knew the time was close, when they stopped responding to outside stimuli and seemed to be more focused internally. Others, they didn't want to be alone for a single moment.

We really can't know if he knew what was going on. We can't know what his wishes were regarding that time, if he wanted to be alone or if he wanted to be surrounded by others. When poppys asked about my dad, he'd had a close call prior to his sudden passing, and he told my aunt (my mom's sister) that he was terrified of being alone when that time came. People tend to be afraid of the unknown. But as I said, in my original post to poppys, "I think for most people, it just hurts for them to imagine someone dying alone, not surrounded by people they love." We're social creatures, and we often forget that dying is a very intimate and private thing to do.

I don't know what Prince's wishes were about that time. I've not even tried to guess what his wishes were. I was simply pointing out that it is usually the living that think the dying shouldn't be left alone. And my posts have been about what those that are remaining behind usually are thinking or feeling, not what the one who is passing is wanting.

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Reply #12 posted 05/15/18 9:45pm

jdcxc

I really wish the NPR writer would disclose what was said in his cne hour phone call.

Thanks for posting.
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Reply #13 posted 05/16/18 4:49am

PennyPurple

avatar

poppys said:

Do you really think your father thought - I'm alone and I'm dying alone? I'm not so sure. And I'm not sure it is natural to think that it is negative, fan of Prince or not. Just more pressure.

Pets who are dearly loved often go away to die, they want to be alone. Family members can keep watch over a dying loved one in hospice for weeks on end - then their loved one dies when they finally leave the room. It's very common. The hospice staff will tell you, the person chose their time, they wanted to be alone.

Very true Poppys. My father was transferred from 1 hospital to another where there was hospice, because that's what he wanted. He and his wife went by ambulance. We 3 kids of course had our own cars and driving to the other hospital. He died as soon as they got him into the hospice bed with only his wife by his side. He was in good spirits and laughing and joking with the ambulance drivers when they were loading him up, even telling 1 of them to move over and he would drive. Before they loaded him up he told me to come there and give him a kiss a goodbye, I did but I told him I would see him in less than an hour. sad I should've known.

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Reply #14 posted 05/16/18 6:15am

stlmuziqlvr

Sounds like you were very special to him.

PennyPurple said:

poppys said:

Do you really think your father thought - I'm alone and I'm dying alone? I'm not so sure. And I'm not sure it is natural to think that it is negative, fan of Prince or not. Just more pressure.

Pets who are dearly loved often go away to die, they want to be alone. Family members can keep watch over a dying loved one in hospice for weeks on end - then their loved one dies when they finally leave the room. It's very common. The hospice staff will tell you, the person chose their time, they wanted to be alone.

Very true Poppys. My father was transferred from 1 hospital to another where there was hospice, because that's what he wanted. He and his wife went by ambulance. We 3 kids of course had our own cars and driving to the other hospital. He died as soon as they got him into the hospice bed with only his wife by his side. He was in good spirits and laughing and joking with the ambulance drivers when they were loading him up, even telling 1 of them to move over and he would drive. Before they loaded him up he told me to come there and give him a kiss a goodbye, I did but I told him I would see him in less than an hour. sad I should've known.

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Reply #15 posted 05/16/18 6:16am

stlmuziqlvr

If it's been posted before, I missed it so thanks for posting this, benni.

benni said:

It probably has been, but I don't recall reading it before.


https://www.npr.org/secti...permission

[Edited 5/15/18 12:21pm]

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Reply #16 posted 05/16/18 7:36am

anangellooksdo
wn

I’m about to read the article Benni.

As for being alone, Prince liked quiet, and silence, and also yes, being alone sometimes.

The biggest human fear is dying alone.
Prince wasn’t afraid.
Because when we seek God, which is the purpose of all life, we are definitely not alone.
~Paisley Park is in your heart~
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Reply #17 posted 05/16/18 7:44am

poppys

anangellooksdown said:

I’m about to read the article Benni. As for being alone, Prince liked quiet, and silence, and also yes, being alone sometimes. The biggest human fear is dying alone. Prince wasn’t afraid. Because when we seek God, which is the purpose of all life, we are definitely not alone.


That may be your biggest human fear - but it's not mine.

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Reply #18 posted 05/16/18 7:47am

poppys

PennyPurple said:

poppys said:

Do you really think your father thought - I'm alone and I'm dying alone? I'm not so sure. And I'm not sure it is natural to think that it is negative, fan of Prince or not. Just more pressure.

Pets who are dearly loved often go away to die, they want to be alone. Family members can keep watch over a dying loved one in hospice for weeks on end - then their loved one dies when they finally leave the room. It's very common. The hospice staff will tell you, the person chose their time, they wanted to be alone.

Very true Poppys. My father was transferred from 1 hospital to another where there was hospice, because that's what he wanted. He and his wife went by ambulance. We 3 kids of course had our own cars and driving to the other hospital. He died as soon as they got him into the hospice bed with only his wife by his side. He was in good spirits and laughing and joking with the ambulance drivers when they were loading him up, even telling 1 of them to move over and he would drive. Before they loaded him up he told me to come there and give him a kiss a goodbye, I did but I told him I would see him in less than an hour. sad I should've known.

Awww, I love your Dad, what a great sense of humor! hug

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Reply #19 posted 05/16/18 7:51am

anangellooksdo
wn

poppys said:



anangellooksdown said:


I’m about to read the article Benni. As for being alone, Prince liked quiet, and silence, and also yes, being alone sometimes. The biggest human fear is dying alone. Prince wasn’t afraid. Because when we seek God, which is the purpose of all life, we are definitely not alone.


That may be your biggest human fear - but it's not mine.



It takes a lot of work to get down to the main one.
It is in fact under all the others.
~Paisley Park is in your heart~
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Reply #20 posted 05/16/18 7:53am

anangellooksdo
wn

I liked the article.
He obviously loves Prince.
The only thing I will reiterate is many of us feel very sad that Prince was “alone” when he died, because that’s our fears mirroring off him and his situation.
He was okay.
~Paisley Park is in your heart~
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Reply #21 posted 05/16/18 7:54am

poppys

anangellooksdown said:

poppys said:


That may be your biggest human fear - but it's not mine.


It takes a lot of work to get down to the main one. It is in fact under all the others.


Nope. Like many things, this is not a one size fits all.


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Reply #22 posted 05/16/18 8:00am

anangellooksdo
wn

poppys said:



anangellooksdown said:


poppys said:



That may be your biggest human fear - but it's not mine.




It takes a lot of work to get down to the main one. It is in fact under all the others.



Nope. Like many things, this is not a one size fits all.




Actually, at the core we are all the same.
~Paisley Park is in your heart~
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Reply #23 posted 05/16/18 8:16am

poppys

anangellooksdown said:

poppys said:


Nope. Like many things, this is not a one size fits all.



Actually, at the core we are all the same.


I disagree that everyone has the same biggest fear. That's my opinion. You have your own. We are getting off-topic on a tangent here. I'm moving on.


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Reply #24 posted 05/16/18 8:18am

anangellooksdo
wn

poppys said:



anangellooksdown said:


poppys said:



Nope. Like many things, this is not a one size fits all.





Actually, at the core we are all the same.



I disagree that everyone has the same biggest fear. That's my opinion. You have your own. We are getting off-topic on a tangent here. I'm moving on.




What I do is for the man or the woman who has nothing left to debate or discuss.
~Paisley Park is in your heart~
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Reply #25 posted 05/16/18 8:27am

poppys

anangellooksdown said:

poppys said:


I disagree that everyone has the same biggest fear. That's my opinion. You have your own. We are getting off-topic on a tangent here. I'm moving on.



What I do is for the man or the woman who has nothing left to debate or discuss.


Whatever - this is not a thread about Religion. There is another forum for that.


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Reply #26 posted 05/16/18 12:36pm

luvsexy4all

rare article written by someone who seems to have a grip on reality

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Reply #27 posted 05/16/18 2:56pm

cloveringold85

avatar

benni said:

poppys said:

I'm thinking, am I the only person who understands that Prince wanted to be alone when he was alone? It should be separate from his death.

My friend died of an accidental overdose with her partner in the bed next to her. Would it have been worse if she were alone? No.


[Edited 5/15/18 16:39pm]


No, you aren't the only one to understand that poppys. I get that desire to be alone when I want to be alone, and don't bother me when I'm in that mood. But I think for most people, it just hurts for them to imagine someone dying alone, not surrounded by people they love.

My father died alone. We didn't even realize anything was wrong until he didn't show up at my grandma's like he was supposed to. The hardest thing in the world is for me to picture him, in that moment of dying, alone and maybe afraid and scared and feeling unloved because there was no one with him. And I often think, "Someone should have been there!" I think it's just natural for people to feel that way when someone dies suddenly and unexpectedly (especially for us fans).

.

I'm so sorry for your loss, Benni. My Mother passed away in the hospital, and I wasn't there--it still bothers me that she was alone. It is my hope that she went peacefully. sad

.

I get the "alone" thing too -- it's good to be alone and have that quiet time for yourself.

"With love, honor, and respect for every living thing in the universe, separation ceases, and we all become one being, singing one song." - Prince Roger Nelson (1958-2016)
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Reply #28 posted 05/16/18 3:04pm

cloveringold85

avatar

PennyPurple said:

poppys said:

Do you really think your father thought - I'm alone and I'm dying alone? I'm not so sure. And I'm not sure it is natural to think that it is negative, fan of Prince or not. Just more pressure.

Pets who are dearly loved often go away to die, they want to be alone. Family members can keep watch over a dying loved one in hospice for weeks on end - then their loved one dies when they finally leave the room. It's very common. The hospice staff will tell you, the person chose their time, they wanted to be alone.

Very true Poppys. My father was transferred from 1 hospital to another where there was hospice, because that's what he wanted. He and his wife went by ambulance. We 3 kids of course had our own cars and driving to the other hospital. He died as soon as they got him into the hospice bed with only his wife by his side. He was in good spirits and laughing and joking with the ambulance drivers when they were loading him up, even telling 1 of them to move over and he would drive. Before they loaded him up he told me to come there and give him a kiss a goodbye, I did but I told him I would see him in less than an hour. sad I should've known.

.

Penny, your Grandfather sounds like he was a wonderful man -- a real trooper! hug

.

I think different people face death differently, based on their life experiences and religious faith/beliefs.

.

Prince was very religious and spiritual and he seemed to be a peace in his life, so he probably embraced the other side. He didn't believe in celebrating birthdays, because he said he would celebrate when he dies.

"With love, honor, and respect for every living thing in the universe, separation ceases, and we all become one being, singing one song." - Prince Roger Nelson (1958-2016)
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Reply #29 posted 05/18/18 11:07pm

Mumio

avatar

No, you aren't. I feel pretty certain that most, if not all, of the things Prince did were done purposefully. Fully in control.



poppys said:

I'm thinking, am I the only person who understands that Prince wanted to be alone when he was alone? It should be separate from his death.

My friend died of an accidental overdose with her partner in the bed next to her. Would it have been worse if she were alone? No.


[Edited 5/15/18 16:39pm]

Welcome to "the org", Mumio…they can have you, but I'll have your love in the end nod
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